Colleen

Steve

Heaven seems just a little bit closer today
As I draw near, these words are so hard to say 
All the feelings that I’ve kept so long inside
To explain in some understandable way

So many years have gone since I saw you last
A spring breeze floats memories of you through my mind
Something in my heart knew I would find you again
Yet, it seems like yesterday when your love was mine

You softly brought your love to me
Praying the pain in my heart away you could take
I took a chance on ending this misery
After so much loneliness and heartache

But to me you did not come alone
With your love, in strolled another
Fair skinned, blue eyed and beautiful
A young son, who loved me, like his Mother

Nothing could come between us as you were mine
We dreamed of the future and the three of us together
For a while, all the stars in my world were aligned
I had no doubt my love for you could bear all unpleasant weather

But over time, changes in you appeared
You were my hope and all my dreams
And it was to this end that inside I feared
Your demons would wrench us apart at the seams

My love couldn’t keep you safe from your needs
You lost your way and then your son
I’ll never know what made your heart bleed
Away from all love without reason, it made you run

I’ll forever live and die in sorrow
Of the day you said goodbye
Every day past and every tomorrow
I regret not knowing why

To keep pain at bay and be near your son
For a while, with your family, I kept in touch
But I knew for all, it was better I faded away
From whom I had come to love so much

You called days before my wedding vows
Surprised I had filled your void with another
True love who helped me forget you until now
Who gave me a daughter and her, a brother

Why you called is still a mystery to me
Pride and fear kept me from talking to you
Did you miss my kiss or just me to see
I was still so wounded so what could I do

Afraid of losing the new love that had grown
I’ll forever regret not picking up that phone
To my dying day my mistake I will atone
But am thankful for the love you’d shown

I wish I could have been there at the end 
Perhaps if I held you I might have changed your fate
Or only caress your hand as a friend 
My love would have removed a great weight

My remembrance of you is ever so strong
I see you every day and don’t have to try
You’re so very much a part of me
All I have to do is close my eyes

At your grave, my body shivers, I feel you so near
I brought you flowers and place them at your stone
I pray they comfort you but bring you no tears
They are to celebrate the memory of love we had known

I glance back one last time as I walk away
My heart weeps and tears continue to fill my days
As I see a bouquet of color in a sea of gray
Colleen, you are in my heart, always