Drowning

Esphydion Alexandria

Here I am, hating my self again. 
Sorrow my coffin, I lay within. 
Oh how I wish for a smile.
One I may haven't see in awhile.

Give me a place to refind.
The hope I lost in my mind.
A Place without agony or despair.
Is it even possible for life to be fair?

Am I just as useless as in my head?
I'm living a shell, inside I am dead.
Where are you, dear flood light?
I can not see you, in the shadows of the night.

Intermission, from my shame.
Only reminds me I am to blame.
What even am I, anymore?
Just a remnant you ignore.

I wish I could just walk away.
weight of my heart, I am forced to stay. 
Empty, broken, Like the road
Shrouded by clouds, oh so cold.

I wish I could just let things go. 
I'm a monster you should never know.
I'll leave and never come back. 
Just a memory you thus lack.

Weighed by stone down deep below
My own funeral but no one will go. 
I'm gone, and I'm dead.
A demon drowned, neath river bed.