Nothingness on a Dark Road

Nadene Basson

A Dark road, alone with only my thoughts, 
with the sound of my heartbeat and broken hope.
Crimson tears, slowly draining my soul, my hope, my life. 
It’s bliss, knowing that I will no longer endure the struggle of everyday shit.
 
I have been waiting for all this to end, endless nights in the darkness, 
wishing that by some miracle, 
I will just vanish into the lurking nothingness of my existence. 
Spending my time in the shadows that drown me.

Please release me from my burden. 
The deception of a happy face, the facade people around me see. 
The picture of sunshine and happiness. 
All gone, nothing but a memory of what once was.
 
No one telling me that I cannot feel the way I feel.
No sleep, no food, nothing worth having. 
My sorry excuse for being here, for being almost human. 
My unwillingness to proceed with a meaningless and empty life.

Small roads on my wrists, leading to salvation, a means to an end.  
Inviting me into the depths where there is nothing but numbness.  
Embracing death, and being free.
This is my salvation, my ONLY way to be free.