Crackling fire, Alone darkness

Kathja Andersen

A crackling fireplace
A burning picture, blissfull, free fire
Fire roaming my soroundings
Burning painfull memories, so bittersweet
A father, a bad father
A mother, a sad mother
A young daughter, a guilty young daughter

Darkness, choking, choking darkness
Tears, so many tears, so many sad faces too
A school, a school who hated her
Bullies, bullies who thought she was fat, ugly an idiot
A home, a broken home

Sisters, sisters who hated one another
Anger, frustration, depression, words she knew all too well
"You don't have depression!" she would shout in the darkness
"Your hated" the darkness would shout back
Sad, tragic silence, a big bridge
The cars, driving so fast, her thoughts even faster
A hand grabbed her shoulder, a gentle voice

"My daughter, don't do it! Please", her mother was no where
She was at home, Yet she felt her warm loving hand
The school found the letter, she went home
Her mother was mad, sad, broken
The girl was broken, sad, alone
Her family was fine, except her

She was like a crackling fire
Destroying anything in her path, eating and devouring all good feelings
She was like the darkness, mysterious, isolated, taking all goodness and dismissing it
SHE was alone, SHE had noone, The girl had no one
The girl HAS no one, they don't believe her
"Just think more happy thoughts!" "I've never seen you cry, you don't have depression!"
She was like depression, sad, unhappy, broken, and crying all alone
Depression isn't something she talks about anymore

Only to herself will she speak about it
Her and the darkness, the only listeners of her story 
Her fire will grow bigger and destroy everything, 
her darkness will make her alone, her depression will surround her

The girl, the girl is me, no one knows me, not even i know myself
I am no one and i have two faces, my real and my fake one
People see the fake me and only the darkness and myself will ever see my true crying self
Only the internet and darkness listens, 
wether it be with judgemental ears or helpful ones doesn't matter
Either way it won't help
This girl is alone, This girl is me this girl is confused and this girl needs help
This girl is fire, darkness and depression