crushed

sophia

I wonder sometimes, why we have a heart only for it to get crushed and broken every time we open it. Why we still open up after having our hearts crushed. Why we allow ourselves to fall in love when we know nothing ever lasts. The thing is no one actually knows why.

Me? I'm in love. with someone who doesn't even want to know. He gave up on me a long time ago. He was beautiful and my best mate until he kissed me and things got complicated.

Before, i was already friends with his twin sister, and when they moved down my road i was happy that i had someone around my age to talk to when we had our street party. I hadn't really spoken to him before hand, just smiled when i saw him around school- he was a year older then me so i didn't have to go to class with him or anything.

the first time we actually spoke was on facebook after he had seen me in the park with a lad, asking if he was my boyfriend. i simply replied 'no. why? you jealous?' with a winky face to imply i was flirting.

As time passed we talked more on facebook and got closer and closer, then one day he asked for my number, and i gave it to him. At first, nothing came of it, he would talk to me more online then text me. Then it changed and we were constantly texting, from 7 am till about 2 am the next day....and at 7 when we both got up it would start again.

As time went on we talked about more personal things, and the number of 'x'at the end of the texts grew. He also used to call me up daily, and we would talk to each other at school. However we hadn't really met up just us two.

one day, he mentioned he was going to the fair, i said i was to, not thinking anything of it, he then asked if i wanted to come round so we could walk up together. Whilst his cousin was getting ready me and him were downstairs, watching 'batman'. He was tickling me and we were play fighting, and then all of a sudden his lips touched mine and it was beautiful. We walked up to the fair, hand in hand.

This kept going on for about 4 months, we would meet up, sometimes we would talk, sometimes we would just sit in silence and snuggle under a blanket with a film and popcorn, but it always ended with a kiss.

After those four months he started being funny, telling me he couldn't meet up, and we got further and further apart, until he stopped replying to my texts.

It still hurts me now, even though it has been over seven months. And its hard because his sister is one of my best mates, so i go and see her a lot and see him to....he just doesn't acknowledge me. It kills me every time, because my heart gets crushed over and over again