Love Stolen.

Anonymous32

I always used to be sad and depressed about things. My parents were not much help, and my brothers and sisters, well, they were all in love. So no point worrying over some loner who destroyed himself for a girl who didn't even look back.

I was 13 years old, when I got my first proposal. At first, i didn't accept. But seeing her cry, i didn't think. I just said yes. We stayed together for about a weak or so. I was confused. It wasn't my age for such relationships. I didn't love her anyway. She left me, and i started thinking it was love. I know, its a bit unorthodox, but still, it happened. I tried my luck at a suicide, but no use. So i did several things to hurt myself. Not that i didn't try to bring her back. But it never worked.
I'm 17 now. Still not my age. But this time, I'm really stuck. In my college, a girl found me cute, and started seeing me. At first i didn't respond. I didn't want to destroy her life. But with time, i started finding her cute as well. She was absent from college one day, and i started worrying for her. When she came the next day, i offered friendship. She accepted, happily. With time, she became my best friend. And we got closer and closer. I held her hand, hugged her, pecked her on the cheeks, and she never complained. We would talk whole nights. She took care of me as she was my family. The family i always wanted. So i got closer and closer to her. But she was careful. She always warned me. That i might fall for her. But i never paid any heed to her warnings.

One night, talking on a phone call, we started talking about marriage. And i realized, i was being jealous. I was feeling protective of her. And it hurt alto, thinking her married. But i didn't dare tell her anything. I was scared. To fall in love. To hurt her. So i kept quiet.

The next time we met, in a dare, i pecked her on the lips. My first time, touching someone's lips. I was flying inside. I thought she had feelings too, because she didn't say anything, and it was HER DARE. Not mine.

I was happy then. I realized i never touched my 'ex' so called, ever. We got close, but she was attracted. Not me. I always kept my distance. But this time...everything was different. Everybody noticed the sudden change in the 'loner' and 'sad-soul' of the class. i started talking. Started laughing. In short, i started living.

It took just 3 weeks. In those three weeks, we did a lot of things. We met in parks, she leaned on me against the wall, and i held her in my arms. Picked her up. Put my head on her lap, and vice-versa. When we walked, we always held hands, and sometimes she would hold my arm like an old couple on their anniversary. Anyone who saw us, always thought we were together. So did i. I was just waiting her to say something. In the 3rd week, i bought a diamond ring for her. I was going to propose her the next time we met. I was happy from inside, like never before.
The next day, she asked me not to text her until she did. I thought maybe its a family problem. She didn't tell when i asked. So i always waited for her. Day and night, everywhere, every time. But she didn't text.

7 days later, she texted. But felt like it was someone else. So rude, so hard...I was certain it wasn't my girl. So i asked what the matter was. It turned out it was her, after all. But she didn't tell me what was going on with her. It hurt. She was rude. She was turning out like everyone else in my life. But i still hoped for her. I hoped she will be back. And then again, i wasn't really sure she was leaving me. So i waited.
3 months i endured all this. Sadness. Anxiety. Loss of interest in everything... But still, i waited. I thought she would return, no matter what. And i was right. She returned, but not as my lover.

She said she would never leave me, because i had no one else to talk to. And that everyone else hurt me. And that she realized what was going on. She knew I was falling for her. So she decided to get back. She told me there was someone else she loved. And that she could never be mine. She said she didn't have time. These lines really broke my heart. But i dared not say anything. I didn't want to destroy her life because of me. So i just said that there was no such thing. I thought her just as my best friend. She said she didn't consider me as a best friend. Just a close friend. That night she hurt me again and again. Everything she said hurt me more. But i didn't say anything. I didn't want her to feel guilty. Specially not for me. Time passed, and she took me to meet her boyfriend. In that same park. On that same point where we used to stand. The same place where i pecked her on the lips. I loved to be here.

But not then. I always wanted to kiss her. Kiss, not a peck. They kissed each other. And there was nothing i could do about it. I saw him take my life away. I saw her do with him what i always wanted to do with her. I saw her love him. I was smiling, i clapped in front of them, encouraged them. Wished them to be together forever. Laughed with them. Offered a toast in their name. But from the inside, i was crying. I don't know how i controlled it. But I'm glad i did. I went home, and cried and cried and cried. (I know, you might think I am crazy, a boy crying). But there was nothing i could do anymore.

Wherever we went, he came with her. I saw them kiss, i saw him take my place (as in time. She gave him the time she used to give me). I was just an option for her when she was bored or alone. though i was glad that i could help, at least in some way. I prioritized her over everything, but she prioritized everything over me.

I asked if her boyfriend minds me being her friend. But she said no. I brought up many excuses why she should leave me. But she always said "Don't worry, I wont leave you, ever."

This means i have a pretty hard life coming up. I really hope she stays happy with that guy. But sometimes i wish she would just leave me. At least it would help, in a way. I wont have to see my love of life stolen from me. I still look at the ring and teddies i bought for her...And cry.