A Drop In The Ocean
TheBrokenKid
04 Aug, 2012 09:17 AM
Its been a month, a week, and 3 days since we last spoke. I'm trying not to care anymore even though I think about you 24/7 to this day. I'm proud of how strong I have been with dropping you out of my life but its funny how I still remember the first time we met. what you were wearing, how you were looking at me,and what you were doing. You seemed harmless. I thought I'd be the harmful one.. yeah shit was rocky but I knew no matter what, you would always stick by my side like my ride or die. I thought we would always work out our differences. I never knew what love was till I fell for you. But I also didn't know that that would be the worst mistake in my life so far that I would ever make.
It'll be a year that we've been broken up in 17 days. shocking that I'm still hurting. The sad thing is that I would give you a second chance if you asked... but I saw your true colors. You're a lying slut that plays with peoples minds and hearts and finds it funny. You crave attention. You're a player. You're a cheater. To sum it all up, your nothing but the lowest form of bitch there is. But yet I still love you ?! I hate that I love you. I can only hope that one day you realize how bad you fucked up. I let down my guard with you, let you take my virginity. I should've known when you told me I'd regret it, that you were telling the truth.
Well I do regret it. I regret meeting you. I've seen things, heard things about you, but that never caused me to give up on chasing after you, trying to get you back, waiting 6 months on something that even though I knew wasn't coming, I still had hope and never gave up. Every time you hurt me, I forgave you knowing I'd be hurt again but I didn't care because as long as I had you in my life, nothing else mattered. You're the only girl I'll ever love and I put that on everything I have.
I know now that I was the one that got away and I'm proud to say that because as I see the others you play still there, being hurt and the pain there going through. I am free. you can no longer over power me, control me, hurt me. You always saw right through me. You always got what you want but I'll be the first mother fucker to deny you. So many nights I cried over you, so many songs we shared that I wont ever be able to listen to again without tearing up. I'm not gonna lie I still go look at the old pictures, but that's only because I miss the memories, not the person.
I've spilled my heart to you so many times, and so many times you responded with bullshit, bullshit that I believed even though deep down inside I knew it wasn't true. You were like an addiction, and I still have relapses, but so far I'm sober, and I've got a sponsor in my life that puts an even better smile on my face then you ever will again.
Goodbye beautiful!!
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Comments
Post a Comment17 Dec, 2012 03:19 PM
This really has opened my heart in so many ways. I wanted to thank you for posting this. Even though it has helped you, it has also helped me.
My boyfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago. Actually, he dumped me for his ex girlfriend and told me he only used me for her. I was a play doll from a dude who was once that girl's. I keep praying and hoping to God that maybe one day he'll see through her lies and come back to me. But, I do not want to take him back. Yet, I'm inlove with not him, but the person I once thought he was.
I still remember our first date. He kissed me in front of all his friends, including her. The funny thing is everyone (except me) new the evil thing he was trying to do. I fell for it all. His friends laughed at his stupid, ignorant, and playerish plan as if I was some joke: yet, I feel as if I am one.
He and I dated for 9 months, 3 weeks and 14 days. Yet, it still feels like we were together forever.
- I need help to get over this ass of a guy.
18 Jan, 2013 01:45 AM
I don't know why but I really enjoyed this. Not in a comical way but in a way that I believe it could change lives. Seeing that even though it's hard you believe that you still have a life after what she did to you. I don't know what she did to you but I don't need to. Just keep believing in yourself and know that you are strong enough to get through it. :) Good luck!
01 Feb, 2013 05:13 PM
I get it bro, there are a lot of girls like that in my school and I hate them but when you first meet them there usually the innocent ones unfortunately, but there will be a girl out there waiting for you, don't give. @Kalee, if you need help kik me in Instagram JumpAround34
17 Jul, 2015 01:06 AM
Damn that was some rns...