Forever Always Seemed Longer to Me

Mika Grey

Once upon a time a little girl fell in love with a little boy. Their older sisters were best friends and often dragged the little boy and girl along because they were babysitting.

The girl loved the boy from day one. The day when he held her hand and told her he'd help her through anything. As they got older, her crush only grew and grew and grew. She watched him from a far, as their friendship had lessened the older and more different they got. Her heart ached for him, but she let him be free. She would never take his freedom from him.

She watched him fall in love again and again, and was there to pick up the pieces of his heart and put them back together when it broke. Vice Versa, he was always there to pick up her broken relationships, too. But she tried harder. Always pushing him towards happiness.

One day, another girl 'fell in love' with the boy. The girl was the little girl's friend. Despite her protesting heart, she pushed them together, always looking out for everyone's happiness but her own. But, something changed. Her pushing somehow caused him to notice her. To smile and hold hands and laugh with her. Her heart raced in her chest whenever he pulled her into a hug.

And, finally, when he asked her to love him, she was able to spill her heart. They loved bright and warm, years of friendship falling into a more intimate relationship. But, she should have known.

She should have realized that she could never be this happy for long.

A day before our one year anniversary, he slept with my best friend. It killed me. Because not only did I lose my boyfriend, I lost the best friend I'd had since I could toddle on two legs. He broke my heart and there was no one around to pick up the pieces. I would pick up the phone and dial his number, trying to tell him something funny I saw, only to remember that I couldn't call him anymore.

I felt so lost. What was I supposed to do without him? We went to each other for everything. It hurt more than anything I'd ever felt before. I loved him.

It's been a year. He never apologized and I was never able to look at him the same way again.