I will never have true love...
Farida
24 Oct, 2012 09:08 AM
This is the story or a girl who fell in love but it's too late. That girl is me. I've known him for five years, he has loved me for two years, and yet...I realized how deep my feelings are for him...When I left Egypt. I lived in Egypt for most of my life, but currently I live in England. My father's job is the reason why I travel, we have been to Dubai, Lebanon, France, Egypt and England. I'm still fifteen, and I've lived in that much places. I never minded travelling. In fact I love travelling, but when it depends on losing your friends, its a bit hard. I was in Egypt when my father got his job in England. I was thirteen, and it was very hard for me to leave my best friends...It was also a bit hard to say goodbye to him knowing that he does love me.
I never thought that I'm the kind of girl who would ever fall in love, but when my father told me we are going to England it hit me. I did love him too..I tried to tell him that I can't leave, but I never convinced him. I'm not allowed to add boys on Facebook, so I couldn't talk to him. But my parents don't have twitter, so he followed me and now we talk all the time. It might be great that we can talk, but its not...I'm never going back to Egypt and I will never see him again. He doesn't know that I love him...but he told me that even if he won't ever see me again that he's in love with me..
I don't know what to do..I'm already in love with the only guy I will never see again. I don't know what to do, every single time we talk I fall for him more and more and more..If I stop feeling this for him I know its going to be all ok, but the problem is I KNOW he is the one. I'm never going to see him again, its even more painful when I remember he's never going to stop loving me too, and that we never had the chance to be together in anyway..He even remembers every single accident touch between us, and tells me how good it made him feel. And the only reason he joined the music team in school was because I sing in the music department. He tells me how much he misses my singing, he writes me songs, poems, he supports Black Veil Brides just to show me that he cares about what I think...
I know I will never find a guy who loves me that much and cares for me that way. It really hurts. Sometimes I try to tell myself that it can't be true love because we are too young, but every single time I see his name in my inbox I get this heartache..heartache for missing him, for knowing that he misses me too.
I try to distract myself sometimes by focusing on my GCSEs, studying too much and trying to do my best..
One day, we had a small fight because I told him to stop making it awkward for us to talk by saying that he loves me, and I get a bit oh hope that he would hate me for treating him bad...but he says sorry anyway, telling me how amazing he thinks I am... I once thought of killing myself or doing something that crazy, but I'm too big of a coward. I think he felt that I'm depressed, he doesn't know why though...he told me that everything will be okay, and that hopefully I will go live in Egypt again someday, and we'd see each other again.
I pray that he would find another girl and forget about me, but I'm still thankful for him loving me no matter what. I didn't tell him that I have feelings for him, and I don't think I ever will. It would only make it worse...
Please comment on what you think, I really need any advice, I can't live with myself anymore knowing I'm hurting him every minute...I will update my story if anything happens between us..Because to be honest, I can't hold it in anymore, I think I'm going to tell him...
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Comments
Post a Comment22 Jan, 2013 01:39 PM
Go ahead and Tell him
22 Jan, 2013 04:39 PM
I am known in my family as a excellent listener.If you need to talk and need advice still please email me at Niki.haynes44@yahoo.com,thanks
23 Jan, 2013 01:58 PM
-sigh-..the same thing is about to happen to me and this girl who I love dearly..but she is the one leaving(out of country..as time goes by... it feels like every minute of everyday.. she walks away from me..To Be Honest, confess yer feelings, trust me( i bet yer regretting it nao), all we "BOTH" can do is wait...
24 Jan, 2013 10:30 AM
Tel him wht u feel coz ts selfishness 2hide u r flngs 2someone u love,who lovs u much back.mountains never meet people meet!
24 Jan, 2013 05:26 PM
Dont worry everything will went good :) just do it
24 Jan, 2013 11:35 PM
it wise to tell him what u feel coz if you dun u will kinda regret it like me......
27 Jan, 2013 12:22 AM
Go forward and let him know that you have feelings for him.......u can make another facebook account to keep in touch with him. Its never too late, never hurry.......dont leave your studies...just go on with your studies. After your educations are over than lots of chance to settle with him. If its true love why can you wait for this long when Pem and Tshi can....old but good bhutanese folk tales..
31 Jan, 2013 03:05 AM
This make me full of crying I love some one who does not go opposite to his Parent
01 Feb, 2013 01:34 AM
So ur 15 wait 3 years and run to him go and see him!!!!
20 Feb, 2013 03:32 PM
There is no age limit for falling in love.. Let him know what he means to you, if you love someone i feel we should let the person know and moreover you to know that he loves you.. Its hard to keep or hide feelings within us, it will kill you every second.. All the best.
21 Feb, 2013 02:31 PM
this reminds me of me and my boyfriend
23 Feb, 2013 01:35 AM
Just runaway w/ him :D hihihi!
03 May, 2013 06:36 AM
Never give up... Confess Your Love... You never know what gonna happen very next moment. For all, who Love someone truly, can never forget their Loved one. Even when they got someone else as a life partner.
06 May, 2015 03:52 AM
You should tell him how you feel and when you are older move back and tell him in person you love him.