so called teenage love

lexi

well me and this boy Kevin became friends through my ex boyfriend. but then we became best friends. i could tell Kevin absolutely everything he would always be there for me. but then i started to like him. but i didn't want to tell him because he had a girlfriend. i was so jealous. eventually they broke up. i was so happy. so then me and Kevin started talking. i started to fall for him. we would talk on the phone every night. i absolutely adored him. but i didn't think he felt the same. i wanted to ask him but i was so scared to hear his answer. i loved him more than a best friend. but i didn't tell him that. i told him that i loved him like a best friend. Kevin would always ask me which way do i love him. i would always think he actually loved me but i didn't want to get my hopes up. eventually Kevin told me he started to fall for me. i was so freaking happy. but then this girl Kristen got in the way. i was so upset because Kevin and Kristen started to actually talk so i thought it was time to give up.. because me and Kevin barely talked anymore. i was devastated.. but then a month goes by and Kevin texted me out of the blue. i was so happy. so me and him started talking again. my feelings came back instantly. after like couple weeks goes by Kevin finally asks me out . i was so speechless. i was so happy. i felt like i was the only happy girl on the planet. so a month goes by and he cheats on me with kristen. i was so sad and majorly depressed. i couldn't stop crying for days. i always asked what did i do do get this to happen to her. well gee sorry im not easy like kristen. but i thought he loved me. kevin told me i was everything to him and he loved me more than anything. well i guess that was all a lie. like less then a week goes by he textes me saying im so sorry i didn't mean for it to happen. i said kevin sorry doesn't solve everything and it doesn't really mean anything. he said i really do mean it im really sorry i really did like you. i couldn't take it anymore so i told him i will talk to him in the morning. the next day kevin asks me to hangout and of course my dumb self says yes but i cant help it, i love him . so me and him are hanging out and i asked him why he cheated on me and he said its hard to explain i was getting so mad. so i told him it would take a while to earn my full trust back. i told him i still want to be with him.. so it was time for him to leave so of course we kissed i was thinking in my head god i miss his lips so much. we were hugging for like ever. i didn't want to let go. so kevin tells me he is going to change to get my full trust back. and i said ill believe it when i see it. so i tell him to stop talking to Kristen permanently so he apparently does.. i asked him if we would ever go back out and he said yes i promise when its the right time for me to ask. that was all a lie because now he goes out with Kristen again.. i was so upset and still am. its hard for me to walk away and let go because i was in love . i loved him so much but i guess he didn't feel the same. its so hard to move on knowing he never cared....