God's Love

Hans Jefferson P. Paglinawan

Ben stood on the cliff. He stared at the cold water, splashing through the gentle moonlight. He taught " Maybe If I jump off, I would not feel all this pain. Maybe If I jump off I will be a just nothing and I would not feel anything." Tears fell on his cheeks.

"My whole life, I felt like I am just a trash and just a waste that needs to be segregated. When I was born, I didn't even have the chance to meet my father. My mother told me that they were separated and that I cannot see my father. Every day, I envy all the kids which was saying the words "Papa". Even sometimes, when parents are invited to a program at our school, I envy my classmates saying "Which one will I choose Mommy, or Daddy."
Second, my mother always expect me to be the top in our class, in which all I can achieve is to be second. I think that my Mother hates me when I am not the highest. I think that I am just worthless to her. At school, I also had crushes, but neither of them wanted me because what they wanted was my best friend(who later left me with no friend) and that all they want from me is to make them close to my best friend.
Third, my brother always says bad things and always curses me saying " I hope you just died and I hope you were never born!". At that statements, I feel like I am just a junk, worthless and a worthless animal.
Fourth, my family, friends, classmates and everyone asks me, "Are you gay?". Those sentences really affects me in such a deep, dark, cold way."

And then Ben's foot moved towards the cliff. He was ready to jump off. But then a cool wind breezed his body which soothed his mind and changed his heart. Suddenly a man went and whispered, "Ben, my son, be happy with the things I gave you. Do not risk your life because of all this troubles. Trust in God and be happy." said a man. Who walked away, never to be seen. "W-wait" was all Ben could say before the man left.
Ben smiled. He felt warmth in his body. He felt his spirit cleansed. The warmth was extraordinary. It was soothing, he never felt that his whole life. He kneel-ed at the cliff and said "Thank you God."


Years later, Ben became a successful man. He was rich. He had a company. His employees all loved him because of his kindness. He now has a wife and 3 sons. One named Jesus, one named Mary and one named Ben the second. But, with all that riches, his life was never complete. It was only perfect when he goes to that cliff, and every time he saw a person attempting a suicide, he'd always stop it and this was what he
says "My son, be happy with the things he gave you. Do not risk your life because of all this troubles. Trust in God and be happy."