Why are we still friends?

Sonia Blade

I remember seeing your face the first time we met. You were walking around the neighborhood because you just moved in. You were looking for some friends and my two little brothers saw you. Because of how short you were, they thought you were their age. Ha Ha. Turns out, you were mine. I never really liked you at first, speaking of, I was like 10. I thought you were just going to (like other people in the neighborhood,) stay for a month and move out. Boy was I wrong. Everyday that summer you came over asking for my brothers. More and more I fell into your spell. Suddenly we started hanging out more and more. We were really good friends then.

When school started, we were in the same class. You became good friends with one of my best guy friends. After that, we were as close as friends could be. But then, you started to hang with the popular crowd, and everything changed. We stopped hanging out and being together. 2 years later, we still aren't very close. We had fun times like when we had that water balloon fight, girls .VS. boys. You tackled me and hit me with all the balloons and stole our flag. Or every time I would walk into the classroom, one of your friends would shout, "Hey he likes you!" and they were pointing to you. I would just shout, "I know!" back at them and laugh as I saw you trying to hide. We were children then.

We also had bad times like when we went on that trip together with a few other kids from our class. I hurt your feelings and you wouldn't talk to me the whole time. You stayed with your new friends. I have hurt you many times before but for some reason, that time, I felt like I had really done it. After a few weeks you told me it was ok. I didn't believe you. I made sure I helped you or didn't something for you till I felt satisfied. The last time I hurt you was this year. By now, I should have known not to do it but it just slipped out of my mouth. When I went to your locker the next day, you told me I was a bitch and to leave you the fuck alone. We avoided each other for a while until later that week, my little brother and your little sister had something to do at our old school and we both went. When I first saw you, I just ignored you even though it hurt me badly. When my little brother told me you wanted to talk, my heart skipped a beat. I walked back to you and the whole night, it was just you and me, like old times. We made up that night. I thought things were going back to normal. I was wrong. I honestly have no idea what I did to you. We only talked that night but you still treat me like a bitch.

I read old love story books and notice everything happens the same. The guy meets the girl. They like each other. They fight. They say sorry. Then they are together forever. Why hasn't the same thing happened to us? What happened between us? I want it to be just like the story but nothing seems to happen. Now you go out with a slut and a bitch who is just going to hurt you and, I feel like it's my fault. You haven't left my mind since that night. I try to sleep, dream about something, and then you come into my dream like you are meant to be there.
I just want us to be the same as we always were. I just want to say sorry. Sorry for hurting you, sorry for making you cry, sorry for not taking you when I had that chance. Sorry.

I know you don't feel the same way I do. After the way I have been treating you, I wouldn't be my friend either. I just have one question for you: Why are you still my friend?