do you believe in first love?

caprigirl

Well, it was my first time writing this story to you all and I'm sorry if my english-writing is so bad because I'm not from western actually :)

I saw this blog when I couldn't sleep and this time is midnight already in my zone
i saw many stories from all of you & I think it might be better if I try to share with you guys so maybe it would make me feel better

...
do you believe in first love? Some of you might be laugh looking at this, you're right. 'Cause I myself wasn't believe it.

I'm a teen girl and as we know, I had many relationships with some boys. *it was just like a puppy love at school so I think it's normal*

I've learned to like boys when I was in elementary school & it was so funny. I got my first boyfriend when I was in middle high school grade1.
I thought I loved him with all my heart but then I was wrong, we broke up & I started to like another boys again.
Yeahh kind of playgirl maybe lolss.. but as I said, it was puppy lovesss

I was keeping my mind thinking it was puppy loves 'til he came.
it was my first day in my senior high school grade 7. In my country, senior high school is divided into 3 sections, grade7-9. So I was in grade7 first.

First day school...
just call him with initial "VY"

VY was my classmate. I dunno who he was, where he came from, even his name. He wasn't important for me. All i know was just he sat at behind me & he was very quiet.
I didn't care about him 'coz I had my "besties" in that class so I didn't think about finding new ones.

One day my friend (a girl) told me that she liked VY. She was one of my old friend *but she wasn't my best friend* so I got curious about who VY was & why he could made my friend likes him?
I'm started to getting know him more.. I tried to talk to him.
my first question to him was "hi, you're VY right?"

And days past so fast...
my friend was liked him deeper. I don't even know why but I kept calm 'coz I think it was normal
My another friend (a boy) knew that *secret* and disliked it. He said that my friend (a girl) may not liked VY & he wanted to make VY know about that so he told VY.

I don't even know how my friend (a boy) would knew about that secret 'cause I never told him, I thought maybe my friend (a girl) told him by herself.
so yeaa it happened...
VY knew that one of my friend liked him & guess what, he disliked her. He wanted to make she hated him 'cause he didn't want she liked him.

One night...
VY sent a text message to me, he said he was already know the secret & he wanted me to help him.
I said I can't do it because she was my friend. But then VY said it was okay if I didn't want to help him then he would do it by himself. I thought it was the end of the story but it was not.

Suddenly, VY sat right next to me, he made me feel embarassed 'cause my classmates think that we were liked each other, actually I still didn't like him.
He kept talking to me while I was in class. Every morning when he came, he always came to my seat & talked to me.
Until one day I feel it may not be longer so I texted him not to do it again.
and he replied "I didn't ask for your help, I said I'll do it by myself. And what I'm going to do is to show them that I like you"
I can't even type any replies to him, I didn't know why, I couldn't feel my thumbs. All i feel that time was... I smiled. A very huge smile..

Days by days past... we both were getting closer. My friend (a girl) had another boy to get, she didn't like VY anymore but VY kept close to me. I didn't know when it started but all I knew was I'm getting used to it. I felt comfortable with him.

Hey readers, it was my happy ending story (part1).
My grade7 has finally over and we were go to grade8.
me & VY wasn't in same class anymore so we're separated. Our communications getting lost & we even didn't meet face by face everyday again.
I was sad but as you know, I used to think about puppy loves so I thought he was just one of my puppy love. I was like "comeonn forget him, it won't be that hard!!"

I started to had a relationship with my senior in grade9. He was very kind to me so I thought I might be fine with him. And it was true, i was happy with him, he was so loyal. But then you guys know that a TRUE FEELING NEVER ENDS...

One day, I met him in school. Yes still in school, in front of teacher's room. We both seems surprised & pretending that nothing ever happened. I smiled to him & replied it, then we went to our own path way.
but i still remember how my heart beats so fast... :')

I went in my class with "unstable heartbeat" and I sat on my chair. I grabbed my phone in my bagpack and suddenly smile 'cause you know he texted me!!!!!!
OhmyGod i still remember it in my mind, that feeling when I read his text after a few months not having any contacts with him.
he said "nice smile :)"

Dear readers, I know maybe you guys got bored with this story but please... stay with me for a few minutes more :')

Time is so short right? I'm already in grade9 finally. And oh, I broke up with my boyfriend because I finally realized that I wasn't good enough for him. He liked me but I could't do the same. I apologized to him & he accepted it that we could be friends. Good friends.
I'm started to be more mature that I won't get in a relationship too easy.

So back to topic, I was in grade9.
Me & VY, we had a very good times in that months. Grade9 was just had more than 9 months until graduation & I thought I'd used it well, actually it wasn't..

we both were texting until midnight, telling about days and days, love, family and etc. Until we came to this final texts when he said "i hope you remember this, if somebody told you that I never like you, it is a lie"
But then he said "maybe we're not meant to be together but I hope in our next life, we could be it"
I know... i know what's the problem.

1. Different religion.
2. Distance. He would take college at another country & I would go to another city so we're getting far & he can't handle that.
3. Our backgrounds. You know I don't mean to be kind of raxist girl, I never think about that but his entire family is a different case. His entire family won't accept it :'(

So it goes...
Lost contact again...

I took a college and so does he. And now, this time I'm writing for you guys.. it has been 3 years since I took my college.
in this 3 years, I haven't seen his face.
i just can track him by his social media. Knowing that he had a fine life there makes me happy.

I'm already had two relationships in this 3 years. I know you guys would think that I'm just such a playgirl but no.. it's not like that.
1. My 1st boyfriend in here, I accept him because I gave up on VY. i thought I should find another boy to replace him in my heart and it doesn't work.
2. My 2nd boyfriend is my boyfriend right now. Yesterday was our 16months bytheway.. thankGod I never had a bad boyfriend, i always had a loyal boyfriend and my boyfriend now is hardworker. He's saving money for our future..
He's so kind & I love him. I don't have any plans to leave him.

But guys, VY is my first love.. or maybr my endless love..
Because until this time, I still love him. It has been six years and I still can't forget anything about him. I remember him in my heart, I keep him in my heart.
I know I will never can be with him. We're not meant to be together, he was right. He doesn't try.. so do I..

There are a lot of moments we spent together but they are only memories right now...

All i wanna say to you readers, don't be like me. Fight for your love!
i know I'm a loser 'cause I don't fight but trust me I tried. Guys, I tried. But he didn't try...

All I know is...
every year, he always remember my birthday so he always send me a birthday text. I also do the same..
maybe God just let him entering my life to keep sending me a birthday text? Haha.. idk.. but God is awesome. Jesus is awesome all the way!:')

Fight for your love, readers! Don't regret it 'cause at least you've tried.
True love takes time, but it would be worth it. Trust me..

VY, i love you. That's all I want you to know 'cause I never told you.
And you're right, maybe we're not meant to be together, so I'm with him now. But you will always there, in my heart. I will never let you go from it.
and when I grow old & older, I'll named my child as your name...

With love,
Caprigirl.