Summer Lovin'

Faraz Ardalan

This summer, I met the most amazing girl. Her name is Zoe. She has red hair, and an amazing sense of humor. She was visiting New York for the second time from Ireland. I'm friends with her cousin, who I'm also in a band with. I had a huge crush on her when I met her (doesn't help that I'm a sucker for red heads, does it?). But I realized she'd leave at the end of summer; and not to get to attached. And also, after realizing how serious I was with my girlfriend, I realized the best thing was to let her go. Skip a few weeks. Her last week, she and her cousin have a going away party and sleepover. I really loved hanging with her and our friends all night. We decided to pull an "all-nighter." So; around 6 AM, we were oh so close. We were sitting on the couch, just talking about everything. I realized this would be one of the last times I'd be with her for at least another 9 months. This made me start to tear up; and that's when I realized I still had feelings. Let's skip two days. Our friend has a sweet sixteen. It was so fun. We all had fun; we all danced (she's a dancer) and socialized and such. When the time came, I realized this would be the last time I'd spend with her this year. After most people left, I started dancing with her. I pretty much told her how much I'd miss her. We danced with our heads down. Then when I had to leave, I went home in the car tearing. I ended up staying up all night bawling like a little baby missing her so much. She came onto Facebook around 4. I was so happy. We talked for a while. The next day, I had decided to call her cousin's cell phone to wish her the best and to have a safe flight. I did so, but I was at a party (of someone I consider my twin because the amount of things we share in common is uncanny), so I wasn't going to end up crying. But when I got home, I repeated the last night: watching Facebook IM to see if she got on, listened to songs, and cried. I found 103 sad songs/songs that our band played/songs she likes. This makes it easier to cry. I called this playlist "Songs About Missing Zoe. </3." Pathetic, right? At 6, I realized she wasn't coming online. I slept all day. I went straight to the computer after waking, only to end up to photos with us in them on Facebook. I started to cry yet again. I almost completely neglected my girlfriend- how could I tell her? The next day, I was so upset and needed a hug and to cry on someone's shoulder, so I went to my best friend's house to take my mind off things. Then came Tuesday. I decided to tell Zoe how I felt about her. And I did so. (By the way, did I mention I wrote her a song?) She asked me if I liked her more than my girlfriend, and completely honestly, I answered her: "Yes." Then, one of my close friends (I like to think of her as my "little big sister"- she's tiny, but older than me) told me to try and forget her; so as to not ruin my relationship with my girlfriend; or, to stay away from dating for a while. I thought about it, and after getting a slushie with my friends, I decided to break up with my girlfriend. I missed this girl so much, that I broke up with my girlfriend. I'm a wreck. I still cry about her everyday. I love this girl with all my heart. And I want her to know that I love her. Not all stories have happy endings; don't you know?