You're not in love with me
Minera Parker
20 Nov, 2017 11:58 AM
Dear T,
You promised me a lot of things. Your words gave me the confidence I never had. For the first time I was content in my life.. You told me everything I wanted to hear.
But I can see it in your eyes.. You're not in love with me.
I see the way you look at her.. Your smile seems so much brighter. The spark in your eyes were brighter. I've never seen you that happy before.
I see the way she looks at you too. She seems happier. But the problem between you two is just me.
You think you're in love with me. But please don't fool yourself and me.
We both know that it's not me that you want. It's hurting me each day to see you with her. You told me I meant the most to you.
You said I would look perfect if I lost some weight.. I looked at her, her body was perfect. And I looked at mine. The only thing I saw were stretchmarks and scars.. I felt the confidence in me fade away. It hurt me. Such simple words destroyed me..
I used to love eating. It calmed me down. But every time someone would ask me if I was hungry I would say no. Even though I was starving. But I'd do anything for you right?
But you started drifting away from me and towards her. And in that moment that you chose to make her smile than stop me from cutting.. I knew you didn't care anymore.
I knew you could be happy without me.
It's so painful seeing the smiles you show her. You used to only smile like that with me. I wish I could've made you that happy. I want to know. What have I done wrong? What did I do to make you leave me? What did I do to make you forget me that easily? Was I ready to give everything up for you.
I wish you didn't say the words you said. Cause you didn't mean them. And now I am left behind with the broken pieces of my heart and broken promises. But I am dumb...
Because if I had the chance to turn back time. I would've still chosen to love you. I don't want to forget every memory of us. It hurts remembering them. But it's the only thing that is keeping me alive.
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Comments
Post a Comment21 Dec, 2017 04:12 PM
OMG I felt the same way before until someone new came into my life!!
27 Dec, 2017 07:42 AM
The question was always WHY. why did he choose her over me? why did he said that he loves me even he don't?
I'm experiencing the same scenario in your story. I don't know what to do since we are apart from each other. and he said promises that i know deep down in my heart are all lies, buts still i'm hoping. I know one day I have to stop and focus on my self :( :(
01 Jan, 2018 04:02 AM
That dude is such a liar I wish he was with her!
11 Jan, 2018 04:56 PM
A true story. I loved it. Actually, the story is exactly like mine. No diff. Thanks for the story.
25 Jan, 2018 03:09 PM
I cant believe that you had to go through that but life does go on and although you cant forgive or forget him, you will find someone new. He will come along when you least expect it and he will love you for you... something I could only wish for. Just remember, you are beautiful, and amazing, so he isn't really worth it if he has done that
28 Jan, 2018 02:18 PM
the story is really great....
I love it????????????????
16 Feb, 2018 05:52 PM
Damn, I can relate. Same first initial too. But keep living, forget that dipshit. there are a lot of people out there who would love your chubbiness. Just like how i found my Michael, he loves me with all his heart, love my personality, my chubbiness of all things... Stay Strong
15 Mar, 2018 02:48 PM
Never let a boy change who you are as a person we are all different that's how humans work. And if a boy ever says "you'd look better if", then he's the one who needs to do some soul searching. Stay strong anonymous ??
02 May, 2018 02:24 PM
i think that you should think about the good in yourself and do what you think is best for your mind and soul, girl.
01 Aug, 2018 11:03 AM
I honestly cant imagine the pain u are in.Your lovely and gorgeous no matter what, ur precious and Deserve all the best and please don’t care about him even when u cant do anything about that but one day u will be so high up that u would forget him and he will be on his knees for u. Even if he hurt u so much and hard and ik im going to sound crazy when I say this but if he wants u back as a friend take it even if u don’t like it be the good one saving lives because ur always going ti end up being the good one. Im sure he regrets mistreating a loyal real person like u. I did something beyond than just hurt my lover and now I got no chance with him no matter what I do I just need to let him move on and later along the line maybe after years ill say whats up and as to be friends again. Just know ur worthy even when he makes u feel like ur not. It probably wouldn’t make any difference me saying that because I kinda know what u feel and this all come to self love. You shouldn’t be in a relationship if u don’t love ur self because how are u going to spread love when u don’t have for ur self. Look at ur self forgive ur self connect to ur self love ur self and most importantly leave everyone out and just see u. forget the world for a second go down the beach one day at sun set or sun rise listen to ur self speak out loud to the oceans let the pain out and don’t trap it all in before u get numb. I know its no good things im saying here but just know ur lovely and someone better out there is going to come to u at the perfect time because god makes no mistakes. Everything happens for a reason. Always put ur self before anyone else. Bye lots of love xo
01 Aug, 2018 11:08 AM
i didnt know this was a public comment but i really hope u believe in ur self again and love ur self no matter what u look like, on the inside u will always be so sweet with a pure heart full of love and no one can take that away from u. ur strong idc what anyone else thinks.everyone is going to judge no matter what everyone is going to speak no matter what but what matters the most is ur thoughts about ur self dont care about others so what if ur over weight if that makes u, u then dont change it because it would seem like ur changing for others. i think u should eat as much as u want food makes me happy it makes everyone happy right? starving ur self isnt going to hurt anyone but u darling u should treat ur self with love and respect. enjoy ur food and hopefully one day a great man will be feeding u. a man that knows how to treat a princess right. <3