MIND GAMES

Jesse Boston

When someone disappears for a really long time, especially if no one cares that they’ve actually gone, and then they all of a sudden show up again. Most people will make the joke that the person came back from the dead. Well in my case, the case of Jesse Boston, I really did come back from the dead! A few times as a matter of fact. That’s because I returned from a four year coma. During which I remember every horrific thing they had all done to me. The shock to my heart jolting me back to life one to many times. Of course, I knew very little about the actual dying part. But I knew my so called loved ones, and friends were responsible for at least three of my death's. It was all just haze. At least until my memory flashes came to me. It was like getting slapped right in the back of the head. My memory self (that's what I called it) showed up on my hospital bed and told me about the flashes, how they worked, and about how my family and friends did what they did. I thought I would have just lost it right then and there. So I rush myself, the treatment and wanted to go. Mainly because I didn’t want to stick around to watch them try to kill me again. (Or the other me that is). You know what I mean right. I would die the first time after six months of being in the coma, then again two years into it. I was ready to go get my revenge. So I packed up my clothes and i headed back to California. Not to become an actor like so many others, but to get away from my past. But eventually I decided revenge wasn't for me. I'm alive that's all that mattered. You see, I had a childhood friend and even occasional lover named. Amanda. That I wanted to go see. It's been four years after all, and since I got into that car wreck and ended up in a coma with no chance of ever coming out of it at least that’s what the doctors said I needed a friend. When it all first happened they wanted to take me off life support, but Amanda wouldn’t let them. Being the head strong women she is. the strongest in her family I remind you, and this I know by experience. She was able to use her money and I'm sure the way she yelled at them, she was good at that, the yelling part. She was able to keep me on life support. But I couldn’t continue to watch myself lying there in that hospital bed practically a vegetable. So, like I said, I packed up my belongings and moved to sunny San Diego. This was where after taking a few courses at a community college, I ended up becoming a freelance writer for a surfing magazine.

That’s where james was working he was the editor. Then one of those flashes hit me and I was flooded with the memory of the time when me and James would Sometimes go for beers after work. We would discuss present as well as upcoming projects. These so called conferences led to double dates, which led to me and Amanda moving in together, which led to us getting married. And if you’re wondering, yes I do love her always have. It seems the flashes of us never left my mind. The hard part was snapping back into present time, this was always hard to do because she wasn't there when I realized it. As good as those memories are of Amanda and my good friend James. Nothing can beat the real thing. So on the day i showed up on her doorstep I thought I was having an hallucination, or being visited by a ghost. until she spoke and then I knew she was real.

“jesse,” she said in her familiar, low, sexy voice, “How are you doing?” As I stared into her huge dark mysterious eyes, all our years together came flooding back. I continued to stare until she asked "if I would come in?” Blinking myself back to the present time, I mumbled, “Yeah, yeah.”As I walked past her I could smell the familiar scent of her perfume on her, It brought back memories, very intimate ones because I had bought those things for her on her birthday. After I closed the door I turned and rested against the wall as i rested for some time I said “Amanda”. I could barely get the words out. “ I've missed you”I waited while she struggled to find the right words to respond to that. Then I offered, “Maybe we should sit down and I’ll explain it to you”. She nodded, while continuing to stare at her, for just a moment longer. I then pulled out both seats at the dining room table. That’s when i told her about waking up from the coma and thinking it was only a couple of days later until I learned the truth, of course with the help of the flashes. I said it was so shocking that it almost gave me a heart attack. I went on to tell her that after I left I probably walked for about two months trying to get to her. With the knowledge that I had gotten under the influence of the flashes. He found out my mother had been the one who tried killing me two of the times in the hospital, while in a coma. My father had become practically a recluse. Luckily, I still had my family's good looks, and undeniable charm. To help pay the bills and keep me living as comfortably as possible while on my journey. “But what are you doing here?” she asked me with hast in her voice. “ I still should be in therapy” I told her, I found out from your dad, about you moving back to California, and about you finding someone new, I had to see for myself. To see you one last time. For a moment, I couldn’t look at her. “So you know about that?” I nodded. “But don’t worry, I’m not here to cause you any trouble. I even insisted that your dad not tell you I was awake and coming. I’m here just because I wanted to see you one more time before I continue on with the rest of my life.” “So what are you going to do with your life?”

I shook my head. “I’m not completely sure yet. I have to work out some things.” “Like what?” she said. This time it was her voice that was playing through my thoughts. Telling me to just try to be happy even if its not having her in my life. It was me who had problems looking at her directly. I was thinking about what I would do with my new ability.” I thought of endless possibilities. But I was mainly thinking of how I could use them on her. She couldn’t help but joke. “What did they do, give you a bionic arm or leg?” Smiling carefully, i replied, “Not something so scientific.” I hesitated then said, “I can read minds.” I get these flashes and I can read minds really.

I wasn’t sure whether or not she took me seriously. Then she said, “Oh, yeah. What am I thinking about right now?” I shook my head. “It doesn’t work that way. I have to touch something of the persons or them to read their mind. But sometimes in doing so I get these intuitions on their life force ”. That’s when she extended her hand. Clasping it in my much bigger one, and I looked at her for a second then jerked my hand away as if she had just burned me. “I told you I’m not here to make trouble.” “Why what was I thinking she asked?”
“You . . . you were wondering what it would be like for us to make love again?” I could feel my face turning red, but before I could say anything, the front door opened and James walked in. “Hey, Amanda, whose rental car is that in our driveway?” When he saw me, his eyebrows shot up. “Holy cow! You’re supposed to be in a coma. James had recognized the anger, and resentment I still had for him from back one day four years ago. James had told me that if he ever got a chance with Amanda he would seize the opportunity. James nodded. “Yep, it's me surprise.” James came forward and extended his arms out for me to except the hug. “I’m so glad your ok! How are you doing?” Amanda could sense I was hesitate, but eventually he embraced James. “I’m doing fine.”But before i could say anything else, I said to James, “ I'm on my way to Oregon to visit my aunt and uncle. I just had to stop by to say hello.” It was a total lie. I didn’t even think if I had ever said if I had relatives in Oregon, but james didn’t say anything. I held my breath, hoping that Amanda went along with my lie, and she did.bHe glanced at her and then me for a moment. But before he said anything, I started to explain “Yeah, they live in Portland. I thought I’d see a little bit of the countryside before going up there so I had to come visit you guys”. James smiled and between the borders of his eyebrows was a wide dark patch. I couldn't help but think of it being a piece of shit on his face. So keeping a smile on my face was easy. “Well, tell me all about what you’ve been doing lately,” he said. As he sat down at the table next to me he was facing Amanda. It was like he didn't know what I was doing. He tried killing me as well. But he didn't know I could read minds so he had no idea about the hate I had towards him. Now he gave me a link to himself through that hug. I hesitated a moment then said almost sad-like, “Not much just a lot of physical therapy and getting re-orientated with the rest of the world.” ( in my thoughts I was in his head seeing how this could play out) James's smile faded as he nodded. “Yeah, I guess things can change a lot even in only four years.” Amanda nodded in agreement. Then James asked, “So how long were you planning on staying here before going on to Portland?”

“Oh, just a couple of days.” James's smile returned. “Well, then you’ll have to let us show you a little bit of San Diego before you leave.” Amanda hesitated. So I said “I don’t know you probably are both busy with your jobs.” “No problem there,” James replied. “I just put the latest issue of the magazine to out. So Amanda and I have at least a couple of days free until we have to start planning for the next issue.” I knew they worked together from when I talked to her dad, I read his mind as well. He would have never told me where she was or any other information.

“Yeah, let us show you around,” Amanda said to me, staring into my green eyes I knew she loved. Once again, more than one memory of us together came flashing back. “Okay, I replied, smiling. “Great!” said James, standing up. “I’ll go fire up the grill and you can have burgers with us.” Once again, I sensed Amanda hesitated, but then she agreed. After James left us alone to get the grill going, I asked, “Do you know someone named Amy Kocks?” “Yeah, she’s our photographer at the magazine. Why, what about her?” “I think she wants to make a move to get your husband.” I had planted the thought in James's head. All the sudden I dropped the velvet drapes in living room. She was in the kitchen slicing a tomato, and an onion for the burgers. After I picked up the drapes, I asked, “Are you sure he's what you want?” she nodded. “In that case, I guess I should thank you for telling me upfront. Before I made a fool of myself.” “You’re welcome.” Shee said in a joking manner. During lunch, me and James got along great. I even made up an entire scenario about my imaginary aunt and uncle in Oregon. I was impressed with myself. I knew everything I said were lies, but that was okay as long as James didn’t. Then that night, they took me to a local Mexican restaurant that had outdoor seating, live music and even a area to dance. Being that I was still dealing with some of the effects of my original car accident and coma, I would only slow dance. This gave Amanda and I a chance to get close. I’m not ashamed to say it brought back more than just memories for me. Then after we sat down, James and I made plans for what they were going to show me in San Diego. But we never got the chance to finish them.The next morning, he called my name down the stairs, and came down to tell me he was going to take a flight back home. He said his father had become sick and he wanted to be there for him. I knew he was lying, but I didn’t say that to James, remember I can read his thoughts. Instead I asked him if I could say goodbye to Amanda alone I needed to make sure I could read her thoughts one more time. Once we got to my hotel room, I asked him why he was leaving. “And don’t give me any lies about your father being sick.” He refused to look at me directly. “I thought I could do this with no problem,” he replied. “I know you still are in love with her, so I figured it would be okay if I had the affair with Amy from my office. I have been denying myself of her for the past year. I thought if I left you two your old feelings would come back, and you two would fall into something that you never really lost. I see the way she looks at you. I wasted so much time trying to get rid of you, I lost focus on winning her heart, that I now know has always belongs to you. I was wrong I thought being around you and her would be easy but it's not. I wanted this it's a easy way out. I'd rather think of anything but you two. Besides the thought of you two is a reminder that i'll never be you, and I'll never have her.” “ the feelings were the same for me,” I said, looking him straight in the eyes. I thought long and hard, I thought of what I would have to tell Amanda of how James left her. Ask her if she would give me another chance. I used all my strength to drag myself over to the bed, then I was interrupted by the blast of a car horn. Trying to say my goodbye. "I think that’s your ride to the airport James,” I quickly said. On his way out he said after I'm gone tell Amanda im sorry. But I had no intention of doing that, I'm not telling her any of that. I was going to make him look like a jackass. I felt a moment of panic. “What about my rental car?”
“I already turned the car in how would I get to her”.

My panic turned to a moment of anger. Then out of nowhere I heard “You aren’t wasting any time, are you?” Amanda walked in after James pulled off.

“No,” I said as I turned to grab my travel bag off the bed. I followed her out to her car and grabbed her hand just before I climbed in. “ I asked her if she knew what she was doing right. How you and me should start over, we could do this start all this over.“I will try if you will she said.” I replied smiling there's nothing I want more. Then they pulled away from holding hands, and got in the car. I got in and watched as the hotel disappear in the review, out of the parking lot and we took a left, headings home.The tears didn’t even wait for the hotel to completely disappear, before they began to run down my cheeks. It took me another hour to compose myself enough to face Amanda. She must have sensed how I felt, because she didn’t ask any questions about James or how I somehow got my way getting her back. As for Amanda herself, I made sure she will never get a email or call, from him. When I was in his head making his choices for him. I made sure he felt bad enough to commit suicide as soon and he landed. As far as I could discover I could make anyone do anything. Including fall back in love. He never made it home. He disappeared once he landed. This time around I knew my relationship would be different. The world of the living will be different I thought to myself. It wasn’t until about six months later that I saw James on the news. He was standing next to the President of the United States. He had grown a beard and had darken his hair, but I knew without a doubt it was James. He and the President were shaking hands of a bunch of politicians from around the world. In the weeks that followed there were numerous reports of resignations of people both in our government and several other governments. That’s when I knew what had happened my powers can be passed on, but if I gave it to him I must of given it to Amanda. I finally realized. That I've been in a delusional state of mind this whole time. She had me living a life in my own mind. All this time she had decided what to do with my life. She would keep me a vegetable and do with me as she will. At least for the present time I'll be right here. While she plays mind games with me.