i like him a lot

ayla lavallee

I'm sorry if its confusing but I wanted to tell it all.

Ok so their was this girl (me) and I liked this guy named Jason and my friends thought he wasn't good looking and wasn't good enough for me but hey I didn't really care about looks, I go for personality but I really didn't know anything about him, I didn't even know his name, nor how old he was but he looked around 18 or 19 but I didn't care cause age is just a number but anyway I liked him for 4 years and a couple months, I always seen him around but I never had the courage to go up and talk to him ... So one day me and my friends were in a little group and we seen him and he was also hanging with his friends in a group and I told my friend kaylyn to go talk to him for me and ask him if he was single and how old he was she came and told me he was single and 17 and I told her to go ask him if he would like to date me, (I don't know why I didn't ask him my self) But nw she came back and told me he said yes, and I was so happy,nervous and shocked because I never thought he would ever say yeah, so me and my friends were walking around and my friend kaylyn say let's go chill with your boyfriend and I was like ok, so we went to go chill with him and he asked me if I got high and I said no and my friend kaylyn said she does and he asked her if she wanted to smoke some weed and I was shocked cause he didn't look like the type of guy to get high but I really didn't care, so they were done getting high and me and my friend kaylyn walked off and he came to fallow me and he asked me if I wanted to share a smoke with him and I said sure so we walk to were nobody was and we were asking each other questions and it was getting pretty late I told him I was gonna go home he gave me his number I was hoping he would want a kiss but I guess not, So anyways I went home and started texting him and asked him if we can meet up on the weekend he said yeah, so the weekend came and I was so excited to see him, when I seen him I got the butterfly in my stomach it was an amazing night, So the next day me and my mom were driving around I told my mom about him she really didn't say anything, a couple days later she seen me and him walking around and she told me I better not be dating him but I really didn't listen so my mom told my step dad and my step dad didn't approve of me dating at this age, and I really didn't care what he had to say I just kept on dating jason cause I liked him LOTS and I just wanted to be with him and when ever I was with jason my step dad would come up to me and ask me a question and give jason a ugly look and jason didn't like that so when ever my step dad was around jason wasn't around I felt sad cause my boyfriend shouldn't feel like that, So we hung out when my step dad wasn't around, we hung out mostly everyday he said I was the best girlfriend he had ever had I was happy. And he said when were apart he had never ever miss someone as much as he miss me .... But we never really did anything like never held hands only once or twice and we never kissed the whole relationship ...
I was hoping he would make the first move but he never, So a couple weeks passed and we kinda broke up well i don't know if we did cause we got into an argument cause he thought I cheated on him with this other guy that liked me and jason even said he seen a picture of me and this guy kissing and I told him I wanted to see the picture but he got more mad and just walked away and left me their hurting he really didn't care and I thought that was natural in a relationship but I really didn't know cause that was my first real relationship, so a couple hours later he came up to me and said he was sorry he walked off and gave me a hug I was happy he did that and I told him I think I might I love you and he smiled and said I love you to babe ....
A couple days went on until one day he said he needed to talk to me and it kinda seemed bad ... He told me we couldn't date anymore cause he said my step dad didn't like him and I was hurt, we talked for 5 minutes and I asked him if he can give me a second chance he said ok, and I wasn't as hurt as much and he said well I'm gonna go get something to eat you wanna come, I said sure and he asked if I wanted to hold hands I walked up to him and grabbed his hand, he seen my step dad and got scared and he said I'm sorry but I really can't date you, I just walked away with a tears in my eyes and I never talked to him for 3 days after that
Until he messaged me on Facebook and told me he liked my sister and I made it seem like I didn't care but I was hurting inside, It felt like I had a big lump in my trout and I could feel tears coming but I didn't want to cry, I thought of him everyday I even thought of my future with him and I was gonna name our kid after him but that all came crashing down and when ever I thought of him tears would come down my face, I never thought love would hurt this much, I'm kinda scared to get into another relationship cause I'm scared this might happen again, But I still like him and maybe still love him but I'm done chasing him and he told me we can try this thing out in the future and hopefully we can make it work.