Shattered inlove
ChantEbiet
26 Aug, 2011 08:30 PMMe and my guy friends has been friends for 18 years. Only 2years ago he told me he has feelings for me since 6years back. He has a girlfriend and a baby girl of a year and 8 months. i stayed with him and his parents for 3 months and the girl and baby came over weekends. We couldn't keep what we feel for each other a secret. And because i know how he feels for the other girl and how shes treating him and know when we are together he is happy. We have been seeing each other for the past 4months. The thing that breaks me is he said that he wants to be with me and never want to loose me and i know it's true. But he cant leave his girl because of the child. I think its unfair towards the baby. He's almost never there, after work he stops by me, then when he leaves shes asleep. He hardly see her awake except for weekends, its hurting me to know what he says he feels for her and don't want to be with her but why did he when she told him to break our friendship and rite me off he lied to her and said he did, is it really because he's scared he wont see his child. Or he wont have a place to go (even tho i have told him he could stay with me)or does he really love her and don't want to break it off with her, and every time she phones he doesn't answer but sends a message as soon as she puts down that he will be home soon. I'm really confused, i love him to death! Hes my best friend! And we have been through so much. He says I'm feeling this way (dead, broken) because I'm starting to see that I'm always wrong about him. But its really difficult not to think the worst. Cause if hes only there for the baby why did he tell her he wrote me off and doesn't see me at all. I'm broken. We are perfect together have the best times, the best fights cause we know how to handle it and sort things out quickly. Please just tell me what u think, please! Don't keep what we feel for each other a secret. And because i know how he feels for the other girl and how shes treating him and know when we are together he is happy. We have been seeing each other for the past 4 months. The thing that breaks me is he said that he wants to be with me and never want to loose me and i know it's true. But he cant leave his girl because of the child. I think its unfair towards the baby. He's almost never there, after work he stops by me, then when he leaves shes asleep. He hardly see her awake except for weekends, its hurting me to know what he says he feels for her and don't want to be with her but why did he when she told him to break our friendship and write me off he lied to her and said he did, is it really because he's scared he wont see his child. Or he wont have a place to go (even though i have told him he could stay with me)or does he really love her and don't want to break it off with her, and every time she phones he doesn't answer but sends a message as soon as she puts down that he will be home soon. I'm really confused, i love him to death! Hes my best friend! And we have been through so much. He says I'm feeling this way (dead, broken) because I'm starting to see that I'm always wrong about him. But its really difficult not to think the worst. Cause if he is only there for the baby why did he tell her he wrote me off and doesn't see me at all. I'm broken. We are perfect together have the best times, the best fights cause we know how to handle it and sort things out quickly. Please just tell me what u think, please!
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Comments
Post a Comment23 Nov, 2011 10:13 AM
I think this whole thing is just wrong, there's two possibilities here, one he doesnt really feel for you the way he's saying and just wants to "Play" or he does feel for you and doesnt want to leave the mother of his child. Either way its wrong! You know he is in a relationship this is unfair to his baby mama. He's a cheater, and even if he leaves her for you whats going to stop him cheating on you? And if that happens you cant complain because you helped him cheat on this girl. If he really wanted to be with you he'd leave her. But he's not, thats saying something. His actions are speaking louder then his words. He's telling you he wants to be with you, but he's not, thats telling you he's lying or atleast not telling you the whole truth. But in my opinion, the mother of his child is the victim here. She's the one being hurt by this, not you.
25 Nov, 2011 10:50 PM
I completely agree with ^
01 Dec, 2011 01:26 PM
hi i think uo should ask him if he really feels for you & if he relly does then uo should go out with him ; and if he dosent leave her then you should juc move on and find someone else thadt wont keep you a secret.
04 Dec, 2011 06:59 AM
Hi!.. well I sort of been to this kind of situation. I really held on for a very long time in our relationship, yes it brings a lot of happiness but it also gives me so much pain..I also thought of the same reasons why he can't break up with her, and its been tormenting me over and over!!!
Then, time finally came that I grew tired of being like the other woman or a home wrecker (though they are not married but they have a child, so they are technically a family)..so I realized, I am single, no excess baggage, perhaps I could put a lid on our relationship, cause I am tired of competing for attention, hurting others, tired of worrying, tired of being the second on the list,. tired of everything.. though I love him so much, I pulled myself together and broke up with him. It was really hard letting him go (as in really hard) but time and distance really helps so now, I have found someone who only loves me, you know that I dont have to share his love and attention to anybody else..and it feels so good! Finally, I am really happy
12 Dec, 2011 02:25 PM
The guy has a girl and a baby. You should just leave him be and move on.
29 Dec, 2011 11:24 AM
I think you became his habit someone he will always have at the tip of the hand when things go wrong someone he can count on, He does care because you two have being together for along time, but if he really loved you he would do anything for you, to keep you, not hide you, He is not only hurting you but he is also hurting people around him, his girl (which you don't know what he feels for)and his baby. you should let him know that sometimes you cant have it all. And you should realize that you are only hurting yourself by still being by his side.
04 Jan, 2012 12:58 AM
What a jerk! What he needs to do is leave you alone and take care of his responsibilities. You need to be the bigger person here and walk away and cut all ties with this guy.
19 Jun, 2013 05:36 AM
Well I believe in good things ends .fo a nw gud thing to begins.
I don't thk u shld carry wit him n e mor . He hs his family n e how. And 'coz of this ul ever b hs secondary preference. Hs wife may b gud, to hm . May b she s treating .hm wel. After all he s .hr child's father. And how to beliv such men who hv .nt been wise to .hr own wife....
He may cheat u as wel smday.
Y to b in a delima to b wit him o watch Wts tym brings.??
And being with such fly man , man wil always .mk u unsatisfied n incomplete.
Better try to quit from such relation. May b it's hard .bt .nt impossible. And if child's d matter thn how .cn he b .nt wise wit his child's mom.....and hs wife sleep coz she s tired of hs cheating o .hr......nd try to understand hw unbearable life hs wife must b living.....may b just 'coz of .hr child........